Despite advances in societal acceptance of LGBTQ+ people and their challenges, some members of that group still experienced internalized homophobia. As much as a gay person may want to feel pride in who they are and who they want to partner with, this self-hatred can directly impact their ability to live freely in the world.
Montare Behavioral Health understands that homosexual people with mental health disorders require treatment from experts who are allies to their community. Our staff of compassionate and friendly therapists help people come to terms with the self-loathing they feel. From there, they can learn to overcome it and live their lives with pride.
Defining Internalized Homophobia
Internalized homophobia begins when an individual becomes aware of and is the recipient of homophobic views. They take on the hatred, cruelty, and stigma directed at the gay community and turn it inward. They may struggle with trying to live out and proud, but they are overwhelmed by the self-hatred society has taught them. Deep down, they fear there is truth to all the negative and hateful things homophobic people say.
While most of the studies done about this subject have targeted people who identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual, the condition can be expanded to include others in the LGBTQ+ community. Ultimately, people with internalized homophobia buy into the idea so many in society believe, which is that people are supposed to be born heterosexual, and a deviation from that is a defect, a rebellious choice, sinful, or other unfounded accusations.
What Causes Internalized Homophobia and Self-Hatred?
When a person develops internalized homophobia, it can result from several different influencing factors. A child raised in a family that promoted the idea that being gay is wrong and unacceptable may take on that viewpoint, regardless of their own sexual orientation. For those children who are gay, it becomes even more damaging. This negative message can also come from growing up in a social community or religious group that condemns homosexuality. The young person develops a pattern of self-loathing as a result of their exposure to this negative talk.
A person who has internalized homophobia exhibits some signs of it, which may include:
- Low self-esteem
- Critical of themselves
- Feeling shame about their sexual orientation
- Hiding that they are gay
- Trying not to act or dress in ways considered stereotypically homosexual
- Finding it difficult to feel compassion for themselves
- Hiding relationships with someone of the same sex
- Asking their partner not to out them to friends, family members, or co-workers
- Ridiculing or looking down on gay people who are out
- Suicidal feelings
Internalized Homophobia: a Guide to Overcoming Shame and Self-Hatred
Seeking professional treatment from mental health experts who can help a person reframe how they feel about themselves and stop their self-loathing is vital. In addition, there are other ways to help someone learn to love themselves and see their lives in a new light.
Identify supportive family and friends: Lean on those who accept you as you are and let them know about your work on self-acceptance.
Support Groups: Many cities have support groups for those in the LGBTQ+ community. They can be found by doing an internet search or asking for referrals.
National Groups: Find solace and inspiration from groups like The Trevor Project, the It Gets Better organization, and Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD):
How to Treat Internalized Homophobia
Seeking therapy can help the individual begin to see how damaging their self-loathing patterns are and begin to deconstruct them. It’s important to ensure the therapist or treatment facility is gay-friendly and can provide non-judgmental support as an ally to the community.
Living with internalized homophobia often causes a person to develop a mental health disorder, such as anxiety or depression. It can also worsen the symptoms of other mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, PTSD, and more. When a person enters a treatment program to address the illness along with their self-hatred, they can make connections about how they think and feel and the source of their poor mental health.
Individual therapy gives people a safe space to open up about their emotions and learn to love themselves. The therapist helps them devise strategies to confront people who have held them back with their hatred. As a consequence, they learn healthy coping skills and become proud of who they are. Group therapy can also help because it brings together a group of people who have experienced the same hatred and taken it on board. Peer support can be one of the most effective ways to help people feel understood and make progress.
Contact Montare Behavioral Health to Treat Internalized Homophobia and Self-Hatred
Are you a member of the LGBTQ+ community and want to feel out and proud, but struggle with self-hatred? You’re not alone because many people still experience internalized homophobia that impacts their ability to be happy. Everyone deserves to overcome shame and confusion about who they really are, and that’s where Montare Behavioral Health comes in. Our staff of licensed and experienced mental health experts knows how to help people address and overcome conflicting feelings about their identity. With our help, you can stand tall and feel assured that your life is as valuable and loving as anyone else’s.
Contact us now and let’s talk about what we can do to help you love yourself and take pride in who you are. Our friendly admissions staff can help you determine what level of care will benefit you and provide a free insurance check.
